Would You Buy a Used Car from This Woman?

Imagine an America in which white people got brand new cars for free. They drove around these cars without making payments, until they got tired of them, or the cars became too worn down, or they crashed them.

At that point black people could buy these cars. Blacks would make payments for years on cars, typically wrecked cars in horrible shape, often paying an entire lifetime for a single car. Even worse, sometimes these jalopies would be taken from their black owners, who would have to continue making payments for cars they no longer had.

Is there anyone who would argue that in this scenario, black are the “real winners”? Those poor honkies only know fleeting infatuation with a car, while those lucky black folk get to develop a deep, lasting emotional bond with a prized possession. And what’s a lifetime of payments for such a mature, adult experience?

No one would argue that, for the simple reason that it’s crazy talk.

In my analogy the cars are women. Alpha males make little or no investment in women, and as the women grow older or have kids, they’re passed down like an older brother’s purple knit tie and earth shoes.

Now the beta male starts making payments on an older woman with considerable more wear. The schmuck buys drinks, dinner, chocolates, gift cards, car repairs, Christmas and birthday gifts, theater tickets, etc., while the only thing the alpha male ever bought her was a pair of edible panties.

But the poor alpha male doesn’t get to have a family. Yet the “family’ the beta male is buying by staking half of everything he owns on a roulette spin with 50/50 odds can be raked off the table in a moment. The chump is acting like Loyd’s, insuring that his wife won’t leave him, and offering a huge payoff in the event that she does.

People who buy new cars usually fail to realize that for much of the time you own your car it is worth less than you owe, and for the man who’s stuck with an ageing, bloated wife who nags with a voice like a rasping hacksaw, the cost of leaving is (apparently) too great. And what little enjoyment he gets from the marriage pales in comparison to the terrible price he would pay if she leaves.

Bitter Is the Lash...

...of a hard-driving, contemptuous bitch.

Here's one reason not to get married, if by "one" you mean a cornucopia full of misery-inducing hornets:

I admit that my husband helps out more than many men, but here’s another news flash: It isn’t because he’s such a fabulously enlightened being. Left to his own devices, he would doubtless park himself in front of the TV like some sitcom male-chauvinist couch potato while I did all the work. The reason Jeremy “helps” as much as he does (an offensive terminology that itself suggests who’s really being held responsible) is simple: He doesn’t have a choice.

…So how have I accomplished this? By holding my husband’s feet to the fire every single day of our lives, of course.

Yes, dear readers, it’s true: Maintaining some semblance of parity in your marriage requires you to deploy the same kinds of nasty tactics you swore you would never stoop to as a parent but nonetheless found yourself using the minute you actually had a kid. Bribery and punishment work; so do yelling and complaining. Threats are also effective, as long as everyone knows you mean business. With husbands, tender blandishments and nooky are particularly useful, as is the withholding of the aforementioned.

The fact that guys, when left to their own devices, rarely rush to offer more toilet-scrubbing and diaper-changing is not in itself surprising. As Martin Luther King Jr. once observed, “We know through painful experience that freedom is never voluntarily given by the oppressor; it must be demanded by the oppressed.”

So why aren't women demanding something closer to parity? While many are resigned to seething in silence, the stakes are far higher than they seem to realize. When wives permit their husbands to shirk a fair share of the homemaking and parenting, not only do they themselves suffer, but chances are good that they’re also sentencing their children to a similar fate. When you have kids, everything you do teaches them how to live their own lives when they grow up. Unfortunately, all too many women are still teaching their children that “woman is the nigger of the world,” as John Lennon and Yoko Ono put it so memorably in a song lyric years ago. And what too many fathers teach their sons and daughters is that men can get away with dumping the scut work on their wives, and that women will grit their teeth and put up with it.

More:

When my husband has lingered too long over the sports section and I’m feeling overwhelmed by the number of errands that must be run, I hand him a list. “This is what I need you to do today,” I say in a tone of voice that brooks no equivocation. He may moan and groan, but the jobs get done. And while I still have to mastermind the operation — somehow he is never the one who remembers that our son needs new mosquito netting, baseball cleats, and basketball shoes for sleepaway camp…

…in my experience husbands are a lot like children. They will get away with whatever they can get away with. When you put your foot down and make it clear that you won’t take no for an answer, somehow the kids’ rooms get cleaned, the groceries bought, the laundry folded. It really does work, I promise.

The Man Shortage

I was reading an article on why there appears to be a shortage of the most desirable men. The reason given is that the most attractive women tend to “hold out,” figuring that they can do better than an otherwise attractive man.

Suppose a man is a doctor who is athletic and loves globetrotting –but he’s 5’10”. The most attractive women will think, “I can do better,” or “I think I’m entitled to a man who’s at least six feet tall.”

On the other hand, a less attractive, and less arrogant woman, will whole-heartedly pursue the “flawed” world-traveling doctor. So while ordinary looking girl-next-door types are relentlessly chasing down the most desirable men to get them to commit, the models and wannabe models are holding out for someone better. The end result is a group of bitter women wondering why “there are no good men left.”

How does this apply to you as a man? The typical guy senses that marriage is not in his best interest, but can’t quite articulate why. Joe Six Pack, or the college version, Jordan Beer Bong, has formulated an oh-so-clever strategy –he will “play the field” first and then he will “settle down.” This is like a strategy of looking around a lot before blinding yourself, or going to whorehouse before volunteering for castration.

What is going to happen to the guy whose strategy is “stall, then get married” meets a woman whose strategy is “marry or die”?

Another interesting lesson to take away from all this is that the more attractive the woman you are dating, and particularly a woman who is “out of your league,” the less likely she is to insist on marriage.

The Lost Boys

In the recent uproar over the women and children taken from the fundamentalist Mormon church in Texas, it has come to light that the men of the church have a strategy to get multiple wives.

You see, if one man has multiple wives, then several other men must do without. How does a community solve this problem? In the days of Odysseus, a band of warriors set out in a boat, hit the shore and sacked the nearest village. They killed the men, raped the women, and took captives as slaves and wives. But in a closed community like the fundamentalist Mormon church, getting women from outside the community is not a possibility.

So the leaders of the church kick out the young men, often by manufacturing petty offenses. These young men are chief competitors for young women, so they have to get removed from the picture. These young men are simply kicked out onto the street.

You should be aware that this is essentially the same strategy of the Mormon church. Why are young men sent out on a mission lasting a year or more, paid for with their own money, right at a time when they might think of marrying? The clear purpose, dating back to when the chief fraud Joseph Smith was around, was to eliminate competition in the form of young men.

Don’t laugh. I don’t care what church you go to, they don’t want you to get laid, either. Marriage is essentially a non-sex plan. Married sex is like the two week “All You Can Eat, Nothing But Watermelon Diet”; It doesn’t take too long to get sick of watermelon, especially when it’s gained 25 pounds of cellulite, wrinkles, and stretch marks.

The No Asshole Rule

I just read Robert Sutton’s “The No Asshole Rule,” which is a thought-provoking book even if the title is a little brusque.

Sutton’s main contention is that even though we may politely label them as “bullies” or “jerks,” the bottom line (pardon the pun) is that the term “asshole” strikes us all as true emotionally, whether it’s politically correct or not. In the workplace assholes have very real consequences, causing a loss in productivity, an increase in absenteeism and employee theft, and causing an emotional impact that is five times stronger than a positive interaction with a normal, well-adjusted co-worker.

The book raises the question, “Why put up with assholes?” The answer is that we shouldn’t. If we think about it, the worst part of any job, and the most stressful, is dealing with assholes.

I worked at Pioneer Chicken years ago, and loved it. I wore yellow and brown polyester as part of the uniform and got paid about minimum wage to fry chicken over oil heated to 335 degrees. I came home from work covered in grease and flour but I loved the job. Why? Because the bosses treated me and all of the employees very well. On the other hand we had people come to Pioneer Chicken from the local MacDonald’s franchise, and they felt like Kunta Kinta leaving Mississippi. The difference was that assholes ran MacDonald’s.

The worst part of being a teacher is the students who are assholes. These are typically just a handful, but this slim fraction of malignant semi-human growth make life miserable. And I’m certain the same is true for any job.

It’s somehow assumed that dealing with assholes is just a part of life. “The customer is always right” is a retarded idea that should be scrapped.

I say, “The customer is always right, unless he’s an asshole, at which point he can $#@! himself.”

But the pencil pushers and three martini lunch swillers in management are removed from dealing with assholes, except for the occasional admiring glance at themselves in the mirror. They wouldn’t be able to feel your pain even if they weren’t sloshed at noon. They don’t have to deal with the abusive, belligerent, nasty customer grinding you beneath his heel, so it’s easy to calculate the profit made by you enduring the most putrid and abrasive assholes. So you’re enduring the equivalent of a sadistic Viet Cong dentist while he’s in the office practicing his putting. The secretary would rather service him at his desk than deal with the Neanderthal offal stalking the reception area. Hey, management and “leadership” is tough work.

How much stress could you be free of if you practiced the “No Asshole” rule? For a moment consider the implications of a life without assholes, in your personal and your professional lives. Rampant assholes are not a given in life; it’s that we accept them as a given. Resolve to free yourself.

3 Foot Tall Crippled Ladies Man?

I just got an e-mail from Grant Adams at net2bed.com. It's a great message with two key ideas.

How do you think a woman views you upon first meeting you?

She's got two instant filters.

The first is "Is he good looking?"

Now, most of us don't have the chiseled features, rock hard
abs,and the 6'2" stature of an Abercrombie and Fitch pretty
boy...

So, does that mean that all of us "normal" guys are out of
luck? Nope. And pay attention to what I'm saying here...

Because the second, more important filter that a woman
processes you through is, "Is he ATTRACTIVE?"

And being attractive trumps being good looking every single
time.

So what does it mean to be attractive?

Being attractive means how confident you are, your
linguistic capability, your body language, your ease,
how you talk about yourself, how well you interact with
others, how comfortable you are in your skin, and if
your humor comes from a place of security.

Women pick up on all of this on an intuitive level, and
measure a man by THESE standards far more deeply than by
his physical appearance alone.

The question is, how do you nail down these traits QUICKLY
and PERMANENTLY??

In this month's Complete Attractor we will show you how
to reach DEEP attraction, and to jettison excuses once and
forever.

Because we talk to the extraordinary Sean Stephenson.

If you don't know Sean, here's what's slightly interesting
about him --

He's won the respect of teachers like Zan Perrion, David
DeAngelo, David Wygant, Lance Mason, and yours truly for
his unique contributions to strategies of Inner Game.

He practices what he preaches and is constantly surrounded
by gorgeous, intelligent women who love him for his confidence,
wit,and humor.

Outside the Community, he's shared the speaking platform with
figures such as Mark Victor Hanson, Henry Winkler, and Tony
Robbins.

That's all well and good, but here's what's REALLY interesting
about him...

Sean was supposed to DIE at birth.

He suffered more than 200 bone fractures by the age of 18, he
is about 3 feet tall, can't walk, and is permanently confined
to a wheelchair.

You read that right.

So how the f**k is YOUR day going?

Despite these challenges that would have buried an ordinary man,
Sean has overcome them, thrived, and become an extraordinary
teacher and an irresistible womanizer.

Yes, an IRRISISTIBLE WOMANIZER.

I was with him last night at a local restaurant and he was
hitting on the 18 year old hostess. And he was GOOD!

Ladies LOVE Sean (I can personally attest to this) and he is
always involved in positive, intimate relationships with gorgeous,
enlightened women.

The cool thing is that he can show you how to get there too,
and help you cut through every negative belief or limiting
notion you may have about yourself.

You can never retreat into excuses again.

Sean is the only one I know who got Tony Robbins to write
the intro to his forthcoming book. Tony NEVER does this for
anyone. But Sean is different. Sean is POWER.

And here he shares that power with you.

Have a brief listen to this clip as Sean explains the
difference between being good looking and being attractive.
And how you can be attractive no matter WHAT you believe is
holding you back.

Click here to listen to Sean.

As crazy as the idea may seem, how you perceive yourself and interact
with the world is far more important than any "facts," many of which
are nothing other than your fears and insecurities masquerading as the "truth." 

Talk With a Clueless Trainer, Part II

I told the trainer I was on a low carbohydrate diet, and every time I used the word "diet" he couldn’t grasp the definition of the word “diet” to mean not just a fad, like the “Miracle Rapid Weight Loss Hollywood Cabbage Diet,” but diet to mean the foods that a person eats on a regular basis. If I say the Japanese diet has lots of rice and fish, that doesn’t mean the entire nation of Japan has gone on a 2 week crash diet of rice and fish –it means that rice and fish are what the typical Japanese person eats throughout his life.

“You need your carbs.”

Bull$#@!

I have already documented how the Eskimos lived on a diet of no carbs, and they were in perfect health. Look, carbs are just a fancy word for sugar. We are all aware (or should be) how fattening sugar is and how it can lead to diabetes. Fewer people realize how sugar can lead to high blood pressure, stroke, and heart disease.

But it’s not just sugar that’s the enemy. Say a person doesn’t want to drink a Pepsi, because he knows it’s loaded with sugar, so he’ll have orange juice instead. The problem is that orange juice is loaded with carbs, as is pizza, and a potato, or a bagel, and all of these foods are readily converted to sugar by the body.

Everything with sugar or carbohydrates (which are rapidly converted to sugar) results in a spike in blood sugar levels. This causes the body to secrete insulin. Insulin flips a switch that causes the body to store fat.

Fat in your food does not make you overweight –it’s the insulin switch, triggered by carbohydrates, that causes your body to store fat.

Get rid of the carbs! Eliminate:

Potatoes

Sugar

Bread

Flour

Corn

Rice

Vegetable oils

Instead, eat fresh fruits, vegetables, meat, eggs, nuts, seeds, dairy products, etc. Use butter, olive oil, and coconut oil.

P.S. And no, I am not kidding about coconut oil. More to follow.

A Talk with a Clueless Trainer

I just signed up with a new gym and got a free one hour session with a trainer. Although he certainly had some useful information, in some areas he was just flat out wrong.

Building Muscle

His program was some convoluted plan involving separate muscles on separate days of the week, then changing up every other week --at least as far as I could understand it without a schematic in front of me. He was also recommending doing three sets of 15 repetitions.

The key to building muscle is simple. The muscle must be worked to its maximum, or to failure, and then allowed time to recover. Use the heaviest weight you can lift, and lift it until you can’t lift it any more. One idea is to lift the weight until you can’t move it any more, then drop down a couple of pounds, and repeat.

“Your body learns your workout” or “Your muscles learn.” Bullcrap. Muscles are dumb. The problem with plateauing is that you’re lifting the same weight when you should be increasing it with each workout. You’re doing three sets of 15 reps when you should be doing one set of one rep at a weight that makes your muscles scream. See the “Max Contraction” books.

Do a whole body workout and then rest a couple of days. At first, when you start out and are lifting light weights, you can work out every other day. But the more muscular you get, the more you lift, and the more time your body needs to recover. A critical idea to keep in mind is that you don’t build muscle when you lift; you build muscle during the recovery phase.

As an example, one trainer in Florida used to advertise that he could add a ½ inch to major muscle groups in a week, guaranteed. Now to professional bodybuilders who have hit a plateau, gains like this are huge. These guys are often doing two workouts a day, of several hours each, and are totally maxed out in muscle gain. When a body builder arrived at the trainer’s gym in Florida, he would measure them and then tell them to take several days off. He told them just to lie out on a beach. For these guys, that was incredibly difficult, but when they returned to the gym in several days, he measured them, and they’d made gains! What was the secret? Simple –they’d overtrained and hadn’t allowed time for their muscles to recover and rebuild. Those three or four days off gave them the time they needed to build muscle mass.